I could never describe to you what has been changed in my heart these last couple days, but I do want to make an attempt and be open with you. The greatest revelations sometimes come out of the HARDEST times. When a storm hits we tend to react in fear and with the big WHY. The truth is with out that storm coming you may have never known that you needed rescued. My heart hit the ground last week in many ways but what God has shown through this storm is something I would go through a million times over just to gain greater understanding in this area. So where has my heart changed? Here is where.
GRACE. I can’t believe what I have thought grace was all of this time. In my own strength I thought I could change things, but never really realized it. Sometimes what we know in our heads just doesn’t download to our heart like we want it to. Right there in our heart with all of the good things is also the sins and lies we have accepted as truth. Our hearts have strings everywhere and the truth has a hard time getting down past the mess in there. My heart believed many things and I want to reveal this to you because my heart reflects in every area of my life. The scripture says a man’s LIFE reflects his heart. “As water reflects the face, so one’s life reflects the heart.” – Proverbs 27:19
The first step in walking in TRUE grace is acknowledging this: “I am beyond my OWN repair.” That alone kills my heart. When I dig deep enough I have always thought that if I strive, read my bible more, get healthy, etc., that I will be better and fixed in my brokenness.. But the truth is, I could do EVERYTHING in my own power, change my whole life to make it better, but because I am trying to repair my life myself it won’t work. Only JESUS and His power can change me, grow me, and lift me out of my brokenness. That is the first area my heart has been convicted. Humbling myself and freeing myself from DOING and instead just RESTING in Him and HIS truth. It frees my heart from the to-do list it wants to so often create. Have you ever heard the phrase, “you need to give yourself grace?” YOU don’t. Only Jesus can give you grace.
Another area I am coming to learn more in is that operating in this false grace causes excuses and false conclusions to rise. I am talking about when we start to blame others for our poor attitudes. “I am angry because HE did this to me”. Oh, I love this one: “I am stressed out and need a vacation!” Again, these areas reveal that we are doing things in our own power. This approach completely leaves out God. In both of those sentences, if we understood where our hope lies they would sound more like: “Today was really tough but I know that God has got it and there is nothing for me to handle.” I can look over the last several years where my finger has wanted to point and blame but really I needed to just take a look inside. It is amazing how every reaction either reveals FEAR or FAITH. This process I am going through really helps me to stop when I feel anything and I want to react and instead I evaluate if I am allowing GOD to do it or trying to do something myself.
I took a quiz in a book called “BRAVE ENOUGH” By Nicole Unice that I want to share with you. If you answer any of these questions with yes then you as well may need some revelation when it comes to grace.
- There are some parts of my heart that feel like they can never be fixed.
- There are things in my life I’ve just tried to forget.
- I sometimes blame others when things go wrong for me.
- When I am frustrated by a situation or relationship, I usually think of what I must have done wrong to make it go so bad.
- Sometimes I think God must be punishing me because things are going wrong in my life.
- I find myself thinking, if I would have read my bible today, or went to church, or prayed, then God would have answered my prayers.
- Most of the time I think I need to try harder at being a good friend, wife, mother, worker.
- I sometimes act like I have it all together even though I feel like I am secretly falling apart.
- Most people don’t know how scared I really am.
- There are times I wish God didn’t make the way He did.
If you answered yes to any of those like me, then I encourage you as well to get real with God and say to Him, “I can’t keep doing this on my own, help me live in your true grace.” It is that simple. Nicole also says in this book, “Grace requires ALL of Jesus and none of US.” That is so good. We constantly have to back up and make sure it is ALL Him. I love that Nicole also says this, “Grace teaches us that Christ, who is IN us, is stronger than our deficiencies, and together with HIM, we will PREVAIL in the end.” She is referring to Romans 8:31 that says, “If God is for us than who can be against us?” This means that life was never promised to be easy. That bad things would happen. We would wrestle, struggle, fight, and have a lot of pains and bruises. That there is a battle we go through, BUT we can stand amongst the pain and the battle and stand in victory. If we operate out of that we no longer FEAR the battle. We no longer get stressed out and need a vacation. We no longer blame. We REST in the fact that we will prevail WITH Him in the end.
I pray that these areas of true grace free you like it has me. I can’t believe how this revelation changes my whole perspective not just in my personal life and relationships but even in my business. There is freedom knowing that no matter what I do or what I don’t do that He wins. Also, that ultimately I can’t make things happen. Lastly, I don’t have to fear and instead I can walk into our future with freedom. That is life changing. I am going to leave you with one more thing from the BRAVE ENOUGH book. Thanks for following along and I pray my openness and repentance leads others to the freedom I have found.
“Fear keeps us stuck; grace whispers freedom.
Fear makes us suspicious; grace makes us generous.
Fear shots doubt; grace sings peace.
Fear murmurs, Look our for yourself; grace whispers, You are not alone.
Fear shouts, You’ll never make it; grace replies, You already have.
Fear screams, God is against you; grace laughs because love always wins.”
Sharing, serving and celebrating,
Andrew + Chrissy